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I need to hire someone who can hug me when I'm sad without fear of having to love me! 

Is it the time yet?

Things don't seem to go anywhere! I keep working hard and make my boss and customers happy, so I can pretend that there is purpose for me and I should still live..... But the reality is that I'm way too replaceable!

I've failed myself!

Today's thought..

Even in best days; right in the middle of the best moments; when my face is covered with a big smile....... Even in those good hours, I still think that it's better not to be! 

It is kinda painful to know that I'm never an option.....
It's painful to see what is happening! 

I just need a fast painless death and NO after life. 
Can I at least have that?!?!?